My Wife's Therapist Just Put Her On Prozac and told Her Not to Sleep With Me Until She's Ready!!! Help!?

Dear Couch,

Help! I'm at my wits end. My wife and I have been married for 7 years. We've had our problems, but we're still together and love each other, and are trying to work things out. She just got put on Prozac due to depression. She doesn't like sex. Hasn't liked sex since the birth of our daughter 5 years ago. Now her counselor told her not to have sex until she's ready, because she would give it up to me ONLY because I wanted it. Which is fine for her. Me, that's not working. Getting it under an emotionless state was better than nothing. I want it worse than I ever have in my life. I want to be supportive of her, but I end up angry due to total lack of any kind of attention. I don't want to cheat on my wife, but there are other girls that want me, and now it's harder to ignore. I don't know how to deal with my feelings. I don't understand my feelings. I have become a pervert and I don't like it. What can I do?


Dear Pervy,

You need to get ahold of yourself! No, really. Get ahold of yourself and then move your hand up and down in a pleasurable manner. You need to jerk off before you start whining that you need a mistress! We disagree with your wife's counselor's professional advice that she not have sex ' until she's ready' because this just isn't going to happen on Prozac. The libido killing aspects of Prozac and the other SSRI's is well documented both anecdotally and experimentally. Placing someone on one, that's already having libido problems is not a good first choice for an antidepressant. It's like prescribing a stimulant for an insomniac.

Don't get us wrong. We're not suggesting that your wife's primary problem, or cause of her depression, is her lack of desire to hump you like the new monkey in the zoo. Her depression could be the result of a number of factors and of course, depressed or not, no woman should have sex unless she wants to. However! Sending a client home with advice that directly involves both members of a couple can never be a good thing.

This leaves the partner feeling like their relationship has been invaded by a third party and that they have no say. They feel as if saying anything contrary to the therapist would be perceived as disregarding the welfare of their partner. Given your description of the relationship past and present, you really should be in some kind of couples therapy. If your wife's counselor wants to tackle that, great, but if not you should seek a couples therapist. The way you describe the past years of your relationship screams for help and face it. You weren't really happy with your wife's ' emotionless state' sex. You might as well have married a blow up/sex doll for that. There's absolutely no reason your wife can't do some work on the relationship issues while dealing with her depressed mood. She may actually find some happiness if you two are able to salvage your relationship. If it's not salvageable, she may find some happiness in ending the relationship. Either way, good luck.

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