I Want To Give Candle Wax a Play! Any Info!?!

Dear Couch,

I'm feeling experimental and would like to give candle wax a try during foreplay. I want pleasure, not burn scars. So, please, school me!

Chemical Blond

Dear Intrepid Sexual Traveler,

We'll school you all right! Let's all give a round of applause to someone wanting to try something new and researching the facts!! The first thing we can tell you about wax-play is NO BEE'S WAX! Bee's wax burns much hotter than the standard paraffin candle. As a matter of fact, it still hurts as we type this! ' Why would someone want to play with hot wax during sex?' some may be asking themselves as they read this while scratching their pointy little heads.

Candle play is part of the submission aspect of sexuality. The recipient of the hot wax is at the other's control, completely. If the candle operator drips too closely the wax is too hot. The wax receiver is submitting completely to their partner and helps remove the goal focus from orgasm, instead focusing on the extended sexual pleasure. But this is often the point of many of our sexual diversion activities like role playing or hippy tantric sex. We try and prolong the pleasurable act instead of rushing towards the orgasm.

For the most part, candle play is part of the BD/SM scene and this is where we found most of the information and safety tips. So thanks for all you freaky people out there that went first. One thing they all say is to practice on yourself first. Using the exact same candle you'll use in your play, drip wax on the underside of your own forearm at various distances, starting farther away and moving closer. Gauge the differences in pain and heat and you can roughly apply that to your partner. Do remember to be safe and have your standard fire extinguishing equipment around in case you start a fire. We're going to be safe and state that we here at ask the couch in no we encourage or discourage wax play...but have fun. For a full introduction to this and other forms of BD/SM, try the book, Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission.

For a slightly tamer candle/wax play item you may want to consider the Tantric Natural Massage Oil Candle. A sexy lit candle with wax that massages like oil. The secret is in soy oil wax. It melts at a temperature your skin loves, releasing sexy aroma-therapy all night long! Carefully tip the tin canister and rub it in for soft, scented skin! Lid keeps it fresh??and extinguishes flame. Choose warm Vanilla, sexy Lavender and exotic Mango.

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