I'm a Twenty-Something Male Who is Balding! I Find That Attractive Females My Age Are too Shallow to Get Past My Hairline.

Dear Couch,

I have a problem. I'm a 22 year old male, going fairly bald, and I'm having a problem with relationships. I haven't had one yet is the main problem. I'm concerned that because I'm balding I'm going to have to go after more mature women or wait till I'm older for a woman to be able to look past my hairline because, quite frankly, women my age are shallow if they're anything to look at. Another problem which I think is driving women away is I show too much enthusiasm with women. I become attracted to women quite easily and most often show it. people tell me I should play the jerk and be aloof but then I'm worried that because of my hair the women me become disinterested. I know I'd be a good, caring boyfriend but try finding a woman in her early 20's who cares about that stuff. What should I do?


Dear Insecure,

Do you know how many women your age we've overheard drooling over Avery Brooks, Patrick Stewart, and Mitch Pileggi (yes, we know we're geeks) ?!?! These guys prove you can be bald and sexy! And the reason people find them to be sexy is because of the character they portray. The worse thing balding guys can do is struggle against it, like the combover or long thinning hair. It screams insecurity!! The best thing you can do for your appearance is to cut what hair you have very close or shave your head. One point on that, if you have fair skin you may want to consider sunning or faking baking. A very pale bald head is rather creepy a' la Taxi Driver. So give it some color but heed any and all skin cancer warnings yadda yadda yadda.

The only other thing women are creeped out by as much as De Niro in Taxi Driver is showing ' too much enthusiasm' . Then again, his character did that too. There's an understood rate of courtship in our culture. Behaving as if the relationship is further along than it really is will drive anyone away, even Ted Bundy. So don't call it 'playing the jerk'. Call it being laid back. Let the other person set the tone and try not to exceed it. And stop thinking of attractive people as 'shallow'. We resent that.

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