Is ball stretching harmful?!

Dear Couch,

I recently purchased some leather items for stretching and separating balls. Is there a web site that gives information about ball spreading or stretching? Can you tell me if this practice is harmful? My balls are tight and while I find wearing ball stretchers/spreaders/separators stimulating, I get quite sore, quickly.

Also, when a man is ready to cum, the balls retract and become quite tight. I recognize why this happens (to aid in ejaculation), but am curious why the same phenomenon happens when it's BM time. Same muscles involved? Is there a comparable occurrence for women?

Ball curious

Dear Freaky Boy,

Women don't have balls and watch it with that BM potty mouth Mister or we'll have Sister Julia (The Enforcer) stretch your balls for Ya! Luckily there are others with the same desire as you, or we wouldn't have a clue. We found this site which is the 411 on getting your testicles large and low. Besides using the usual rings and leather items these guys tell you how to build a vacuum pump to get your testicles to ' grapefruit size...each' !!! We're going to add an additional warning here though. Nobody needs to be told that they are solely responsible for their own behavior but we'll repeat it for those that need it. Do with this information what you will but, we strongly suggest you leave this type of behavior alone. Testicles, as any male will tell you, are fragile things and not able to take this kind of sustained abuse. You've been cautioned.

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